For our Worship on Sunday just gone we chose to play a song, "Annointing Fall on me", a great song with a lovely Jazz vibe to it. I had never heard it before let alone played it and so on our practice on saturday morning we ran through it once for my benefit. On Sunday we played it, only my second ever time playing the song, and I messed it up...BIG TIME!!
As a result my confidence was shot to pieces and I just started praying "HELP ME LORD" and "DROP ME IN A BIG HOLE LORD" and also "LORD LET ALL THE POWER FAIL...NOW!!".
Of Course God did the opposite and made the Worship go on longer than usual.
Strangely everyone at the service came up to me afterwards and said it was the most annointed worship time we had led in weeks! HUH!!! Was I at the same service?? But I guess Jesus does use our weaknesses and troubles and turns them around for his glory.
I am rambling...I just wanted to know how many other Worship musicians/Leaders have had a similar mess up or crisis of confidence.
Good point Nathaniel - and to expound further, it could also mean my football career is still a possibility! I can scuff shots with the best of 'em... :)
i guess it's all about passion! if you play with the right motivations and greatest intentions then that's when it works out... it doesn't necessarily have to be the most skilled!!
Totally know what you mean. But I also totally believe that God takes what we give Him as our best in worship of Him and uses it to minister to others.
And I've definitely found that the times we've been most worried about the worship, they have been the times its gone "best" because we've been so reliant on God and surrounded the whole service with prayer
x
Permalink Reply by Rob on February 24, 2008 at 9:52pm
On this theme, has anyone found that when the rehearsal goes badly, it seems that the worship time is even sweeter, but when the rehearsal goes well, the actual worship time seems to be lacking (muscially anyway)??
This happened to me Sunday night when leading worship. Although it could just be my level of expectation being all over the place!!
Out of curiosity Rob, what is the new song, and why did you know that some people would dislike it? Do you mean just the sheer fact you were bringing in a new song was enough for them to dislike it or is it to do with the song itself?
The interesting thing about a song such as 'the belly song' is that culturally in our churches we find it difficult, as leaders we need to be careful about dress sense, modesty and all that.
Yet for kids, i am sure it is great. I mean, most kids songs have very limited theological content. Do we really want them singing 'meekness and majesty' all the time? (and how many adults understand that to one completely!).
We did one at Whitsun last year which i think was called 'the fruity song' , has the line 'i'm feeling fruity' (i think). Quite honestly i wasn't sure about that one and it had very similar theology in it, but it went down a storm! (and it wasn't me leading i'm glad to say!)
We are all so concerned about appearance and we come accross to others that often we forget that the only person we are really there for is God, he wants us to call his name, sing our praises, jump if the mood takes us or indeed bear our bellies!! We should not care about whether our garments are from Versace or from QS, as this distracts us from Worshiping him. Just let go and go for it, if everyone else is in the same groove then they wont think twice about what you may or may not be doing. This is why I get concerned when maiking mistakes when playing because it momentarily takes my mind away from God and on to me and how people are at that moment thinking!
With regard to childrens songs I agree again, and in our kids groups at Church we have worship time where they sing the same songs we do! Apart from a couple of songs that actually are 'simplified' for the kids to grasp, most kids I know though lift up thier voices in praise higher than their parents, they dont have our inhibitions...we should come to God withthe hearts of little Children. I have great fun singing songs with the kids, but sadly there are people who would throw a fit if I did any in worship time, as if the songs are for them rather than for our Father.
As for 'The Belly song', I like it, we should all try and play it!!
Just catching up and reading some old post and oh!!! I'm laughing like I've been blessed by the Holy Ghost at Toronto!!! Best song lyrics I've heard for ages and ages......def wanna teach it in my church!! :)
I had something really similar happen towards the end of last year. I'd been worrying the whole time leading up to it and the worry didn't go away. I felt distanced and detached andI was messing up- it was awful. Whoever was speaking that evening spoke about how we should not worry about ANYTHING! So (we always do one or two songs to end with) I got up and apologised- I admitted that I had been worrying and for that reason I hadn't led the way that I wanted to. After that ppl said how blessed they had been by my opening up and admitting my weakness- God uses the weak and foolish things of this world....
I totally know what you're talking about with this.
Isn't it amazing when God uses us, DESPITE our weaknesses!
I once had an experience where I was leading worship on the keyboard (At the time I wasn't a great keyboardist.. come to think of it.. I'm not really now.. ) and the spirit really fell. People were crying, others were down in the spirit, it was pretty intense. Everyone felt it.. apart from me. I was sat, trying desperately to hear what God was saying and feeling like an island of cynicism. Struggling against my inability. Making constant mistakes.
God used that time to really teach me 2 things :
1) - God will build his church. He doesn't really need me to play well to do it. People come to church (hopefully) to meet with the maker of Heaven and Earth. Not to hear me noodle with complex and heart rending chord sequences.
2) - I don't need to feel what God is doing to know he's doing his thing. When I act obediently. That's my worship.
If God never made me 'feel' his presence again, would he still be worthy of my praise? The answer for me, is Yes.
Take confidence in Jesus. Not in your ability to play guitar. Then use the experience to improve your relationship and your abilty...